skrapnel

It’s the Fourth of July, Independence Day in America.  On this date 233 years ago, our forefathers declared to the world their intent to fight for a new form of government, one instituted by its citizens to secure equality and liberty for all.

Before you get caught up in the blind patriotism of red, white and booze, take a second and reflect on two sentences from the Declaration of Independence [Read the full text here]:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,

Over the last 6 months, our government has denied equal rights to gays, instituted measures to spy on its own citizens, decided to hold suspects at Guantanamo indefinitely, and withheld photos that reveal evidence of torture.

Our country was founded on the idea that ALL men are created equal, not just white heterosexual men.  It also says the government gets its powers from the CONSENT of the governed: you and me, not big corporations or lobbyists.

We can’t become complacent. We can’t sit idly by as our freedoms slowly disappear. We can’t allow inequality for any member of society.  We also can’t expect someone to save us.

No matter how much you may love a politician, don’t just listen to words, watch their actions. Stay independent this Independence Day.

Logged into Facebook on Tuesday and saw this update from my good friend and former roommate Aaron:

After years of separation and a pending divorce, I’ve recently started dating again.  With dating comes searching anxiety, constant self evaluation and the fear of rejection.  After you’ve been with someone for awhile, these fears slowly fade but a lingering, nagging voice questions, “Is this really the one?”  As you  move through engagement and on to marriage, that voice vanishes, leaving a sense of peace; the drive to find your other half is gone. You are complete.

When I saw Aaron’s post on Facebook, I remembered that peace and instantly grinned from ear-to-ear.  Aaron is such an amazing person who has overcome so many struggles.  When I watch him and Christian interact, I see the shared love and mutual goals of two people acting as one complete being.  That vision of unity is no different than the one I see shared between my brother and his wife.  And my reaction to his engagement wasn’t any different:  My heart glowed with elation because any love in this world raises the presence of peace within all of us.

We all deserve to love, be loved and register our love with the government.  The papers, the ring, the ceremony.  These are symbols that represent a declaration of and commitment to mutual goals.  To me, it’s silly that a person or a state would want to withhold that joy from someone.  The state’s job is to protect–not limit–personal freedoms.  It’s time that people stop the hateful, hurtful lies  and remember that marriage is about love.

Congratulations, Aaron and Christian! And congratulations to every couple, straight or gay, who continues to bring love into the world.

Maine signed another same-sex marriage. And that’s awesome. What was even more awesome, however, were these two passages in the New York Times article:

“It’s not the way I was raised and it’s not the way that I am,” the governor said in a telephone interview. “But at the same time I have a responsibility to uphold the Constitution. That’s my job, and you can’t allow discrimination to stand when it’s raised to your level.”

…

The House chamber in Augusta was thick with emotion on Tuesday as many legislators openly wept and revealed personal details. One told her colleagues for the first time that she has a lesbian daughter; another wept as he explained that he, as a white man, would not have been able to marry his wife of 25 years, who is black, if a law had not been changed. Other legislators spoke of sleepless nights debating how to vote.

via Maine Governor Signs Same-Sex Marriage Bill – NYTimes.com.

The first quote sums up my feelings EXACTLY as to why the gov needs to drop the BS and get rid of separate but equal — or even separate and nothing at all.

When I read the second passage, I envision this cathartic, almost religious confessional of all these secrets that people had been scared to reveal because they were afraid of being labeled or judged by their colleagues.  Instead of reinforcing the stereotypes and perpetuating fear, these brave men and women decided to open up, follow their hearts and allow love and equality to prevail.

For my generation–and those younger than me–the labels of gay, straight, black, white, man, woman don’t mean anything.  It’s time we let go of all of these labels and hang ups and start solving this country’s problems (poverty, education, etc.).  Will we be able to do it? Or are we headed for another 1960′s-like culture war?

The two minute speech, below, from Iowa’s Senate Majority Leader Mike Gronstal made me cry.

Shortly after the unanimous decision by the Iowa Supreme Court, the Senate Minority Leader Paul McKinley asked Sen Gronstal to go in with him on  bill to change the constitution.  Gronstal denied it, quoting his daughter:

One of my daughters was in the workplace one day, and her particular workplace at that moment in time, there were a whole bunch of conservative, older men. And those guys were talking about gay marriage. They were talking about discussions going on across the country.

Any my daughter Kate, after listening for about 20 minutes, said to them: You guys dont understand. Youve already lost. My generation doesnt care.

To our generation, it doesn’t matter. We have grown up watching people of different races and sexual preferences on TV.  It might seem trite now, but shows like “The Real World” helped pave the way to a better understanding of one another. We really aren’t all that different.

We also understand that there are more important issues in the world than stopping two people from loving each other—-poverty in America and universal health care being two of them.  Let’s get past the culture wars and start bringing this country together instead of dividing it.

By granting equal rights for all, Gronstal thinks everyone wins:

As a matter of fact, last Friday night, I hugged my wife. You know Ive been married for 37 years. I hugged my wife. I felt like our love was just a little more meaningful last Friday night because thousands of other Iowa citizens could hug each other and have the state recognize their love for each other.

Does denying marriage from a class of citizens strengthen the love of those already together? Or does denying that right sully the whole institution?

Here’s a video of the speech.  Full text follows below.  How does it make you feel?  Is it generational?

Transcript

One of my daughters was in the workplace one day, and her particular workplace at that moment in time, there were a whole bunch of conservative, older men. And those guys were talking about gay marriage. They were talking about discussions going on across the country.

Any my daughter Kate, after listening for about 20 minutes, said to them: You guys dont understand. Youve already lost. My generation doesnt care.

I think I learned something from my daughter that day, when she said that. And Ive talked with other people about it and thats what I see, Senator McKinley. I see a bunch of people that merely want to profess their love for each other, and want state law to recognize that.

Is that so wrong? I dont think thats so wrong. As a matter of fact, last Friday night, I hugged my wife. You know Ive been married for 37 years. I hugged my wife. I felt like our love was just a little more meaningful last Friday night because thousands of other Iowa citizens could hug each other and have the state recognize their love for each other.

No, Senator McKinley, I will not co-sponsor a leadership bill with you.

Prop 8 supporters wanted a judge to overturn the mandatory public disclosure of political donations because it led to harassment and unfair treatment of supporters.  Funny, I would say that taking away marriage rights might also be considered harassment.

Prop 8 supporters have also suggested that the courts can’t overturn the will of the people.  Interestingly enough, the disclosure requirement was adopted by California voters.  Hypocritical anyone?

Thankfully, a U.S. District Judge refused to provide special protection for the Prop 8 supporters.

>> Read more about the judge’s decision via the SF Chronicle >>

Each year when I was a kid, my mom and I would march in the MLK Day parade through downtown Dallas.  Walking hand-in-hand with our black brothers and sisters, we would sing old gospel spirituals and smile with the crowd.  We’d get to the final destination, watch some  footage of MLK’s speech and hear some new sermons.  I even met Jessie Jackson a few times.

I never understood racism.  My schools were mixed. Mom had several close black friends and so did I.  I was never taught to hate, but I knew that’s what we were marching against.

On Election night last year, those marches came flooding back to me.  When it was announced that Obama had won, I called my mom.  I couldn’t speak; I was crying so hard.

When I’d finally pulled myself together, I said: “This is what we marched for, Mom.  This is why we did it.  Even after all those marches, I never thought I’d see this in my lifetime.  We did it.  We conquered hate.”

“Yes, we did!” she said. [UPDATED: Was asked to post a pic of Mom. Here we are with one of her friends during her last visit to SF. Click to enlarge.]

It’s been just over 40 years since MLK gave his famous speech.  We read it every year in school, but it’s even more powerful if you can hear it.  That’s why I was excited to find this complete video footage of the “I Have a Dream” speech.

Watch it and remember the dream of America: a place where everyone has an equal chance to success.  A place where everyone can live free from hate.  A place where everyone can aspire to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

What’s your story?